I value family, I value friends
Especially the ones who I can depend
I value honesty, I value moral codes
I admire people who carry heavy loads
I value standards, I value the truth
It’s not what you earn or the size of your roof
I value goodness, I value spirituality
I value those who struggle with disability
Because without values
We have nothing.
Copyright © 2016 Elaine’s Bloggers Paradise all rights reserved
It was actually my mother who encouraged me to join an online dating site. I had been let go from my work and as such I was at home 24/7. I used to go to her house if ever I felt a bit sorry for myself, because believe me she would set me straight!
One day I went to see her and she said “Now I have been watching a program on TV where this man and woman met online and I think it would be good for you”
“Mother I can’t afford that” I said,” I am unemployed, remember”! She waved her hand at me and said “Oh don’t worry over that, I will pay” , “It will give you something to do and you may find someone who wants to take you out”.!!
That is how my online dating adventures began, I joined a dating site and started filling in a profile. My mother was telling me what to say (which I was ignoring) I said to her, “well you always say that I am unique, Hmm she said, but not in a good way”
Talk about kick a woman when she is down! anyway I put my profile on the site, I had her take a few photos of me, not the best choice to make, so my best friend took some good ones…..
Mum said ” Lets have a look at the photo’s then” She went through the photo’s saying, NO, “NO, NO, your mouth looks funny on that and then your face looks too fat on that one”
God give me strength I thought, the one thing my mother has never given me is confidence, she does not believe in giving compliments.
After my profile and page was fully up and running I began getting some emails, one of which was from a lovely little old man of 85 who collected teapots, indeed his profile photo showed him sat at a table with all his teapot collection in front of him. That man wanted to take me out for a bit of dinner because basically I looked like the sort of woman he would like.
Oh I could not wait to show my mum his photo and profile, ha,ha, I knew just what her response would be. I went up to her house and opened my laptop to show her who wanted me to meet up with them. It was the first time I have seen my mum speechless (which is a rarity) when I showed her the 85-year-old teapot man.
It gave me so much pleasure I was rolling about laughing, I thought I was going to wet myself (maybe too much information there) . She eventually found her voice and she said ” What the ****** hell is an old man who collects teapots asking you to go out with him for” “he is my age”, she said.
“Quick as a flash (I am my mothers daughter) I said,” Do YOU want to meet him mum”, I thought she was going to choke then, she went bright red and said, “I do not, he should be ashamed of himself asking someone out who is 30 years younger than himself.”
Another time I was at her house one evening and I told her that someone was going to give me a ring from the dating site, “He’s not ringing when my programs are on, is he she said” “No mother I replied” She then wanted to see his profile and photo, “Hmm she straightened her mouth and said, “Oh well he looks clean anyway” That was to become her main comment “They were okay to meet if they looked clean that was the test. ”
At the allotted time my mobile rang and I said its him mother, don’t say anything, I don’t want him to think I am not on my own. She nodded, I answered the call and said “Hello”
“Is that Elaine a voice said” My mum has hearing like a bat, she raised her eyebrows as if to say who does he think you are. Well this man talked loud and she could hear every word, every time I tried to get a word in he kept on talking.
She made a slit throat movement and mimed, He can talk. Well this went on for about 10 ten minutes and she could not stay silent anymore. “I’ve had enough she shouted, he’s no good you can’t get a word in edgeways”. I very quickly ended that phone call, I was scared my mum was going to take my phone off me and tell him where to go.! Obviously I never met up with him.
I used to write bit about my mum in my diary entries on the dating site and she got quite a following, people used to say that she reminded them of their mother, when I eventually left the site I could not believe how many people emailed me to say that they would miss the stories about my mum and that for some it had been the highlight of their day.
My husband John loves my mum and surprisingly she likes him! even though she thought he looked a bit posh in his photo, but at least he looked clean and I had finally got something right.
Copyright©2016 Elaine’s Bloggers Paradise..all rights reserved.
She was so beautiful, possessing so much pose
Giving off the illusion, that she was in control
It was all an act, fake, just a masquerade
A guise, a front, that she would display
Whenever the need arose
Yet she was so proficient at playing the game of pretense
Not wanting to display her real front
Because it was all simply a facade
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I am loud
I am proud
So lets unite
Start the fight
Against the greed
That some people feed
The false compassion to other souls
Who need our care to make them whole
For some it seems to be just a numbers game on this site
To show their the winner and always right
Stop trying to show that you’re the best
Thinking you’re above the rest
This is not just a numbers game
Or just a platform for YOUR fame
This site is for true talent to shine through
Don’t flatter falsely, saying what you can do
To raise your following, to make yourself feel tall
Because trust me, you are heading for a fall
Karma is a wonderful thing
For understanding and humility it will bring.
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My mum who is 85 is a law unto herself, she believes it is her right to say just what she thinks, she does not have a think before you speak button, which can be amusing if it not directed at you.
The other weekend I went to her house and it was a nice sunny morning, I was wearing a dress that I had not worn for quite a while, but due to losing so much weight I put it on and thought it looked nice.
When I got to her house, she looked me up and down and I said “Yes I have not worn this dress for ages do you like it” (wrong thing to say ) she immediately said.
“No it looks tatty and looks only fit for the rag-bag”, basically the dustbin, I had to laugh because that’s my mother. When I left her house, I went home and took off the dress and put it in the bin! Mother knows best.
Yesterday my sister took my mum for her weekly shop and as usual mum was on top form. When my sister parked the car, mum said I thought I was going to go through the windscreen! My sister got out and looked but it was the edging of the parking bay that she had knocked.
Now my mum is very observant, much more than I am, I never look at anyone really when I go out! But Mum noticed that a man was looking at my sister and my her and proceeded to do so as he got in his car.
So what did my mum do, she waved at him which made him smile and wave back. Mum said to my sister, “He thinks he has pulled” my sister just said, “oh mother”
” I think he fancies me” said mum to my sister.” Its more likely he thinks you have dementia”. my sister replied…. Which trust me did not go down well.
When in the supermarket Mum said she wanted some bananas and when she got to the counter a lady was stood in front looking at them and blocking my mum from chosing any. Now instead of saying excuse me, mum said I stood and looked at her. (I can imagine the look) and she said the lady looked back at her and said “I am counting the bananas, I want one for everyday and then proceeded to mention everyone in the family.
My mum doesnt realise how what she is thinking shows on her face. The lady said “right” and moved away, meanwhile my sister came behind my mother and of course my mum was telling her she had to wait until that woman chose enough bananas for herself and her family.
Shhhh Mother, my sister said. “Do you think I talk loud or something, my mum bellowed ”
I said thank goodness I was not with you, “Oooh don’t you worry she said, if I don’t go with your sister I will have a man with a van come. She is 85 but can still use the computer for online shopping.
I love my mum, she is full of fun and has a young outlook, I just wish she had a stop valve sometimes.. !!!
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It has suddenly struck me that I am getting older! maybe it is because my health has not been the greatest this year or maybe it is because in the last couple of years I have stepped off the treadmill and given up work.
I feel so different now, much more at peace, enjoying my days doing just what I want to do. I don’t feel the need to rush out anymore. Been there done that with my previous husband, travelled, meals out and weekends away and it certainly did not bring me happiness.
Finally I have stopped running and it feels so refreshing. I know some people find this strange and they perhaps think that I have stopped living in the real world, but that is not the case. I feel like I am now living as I was intended to live.
Meeting John filled a huge gap in my life, finally finding someone who is happy to chat about anything and everything. We can sometimes chat for hours in the night, he has never said “you talk such rubbish” and tried to shut me down. He is so knowledgeable too which is so refreshing. He tends to do his own thing during the day, he is always doing!. Even when he sits down he will pick up his cross word book or he will read something whilst having his lunch.
Writing on here has also been fantastic for me, such a release and pleasure. I love reading others people’s posts and I feel as if I am getting to know people more and more. I have never been a person who has lots of friends. That’s just not me, I am a very private person. I have always got on very well with work colleges but they never really got to know the real me. I am more of a giver, I have always been the one that people come to if they have a problem. This has not bothered me at all, indeed I am happy to help anyone.
So back to the age thing….. I am 60 in January and for some reason this is beginning to worry me, I don’t think it is because I am getting older, or maybe it is. I think it is the fact that I have finally found what I have been looking for in life and I find myself worrying that I wont have it for a long time.
Silly huh, why should I let something worry me that I have no control over. I am the first to preach that we should enjoy and live in the moment. But I guess I am also human and what will be will be.
I could have another 25 years left in me God willing and I know that there are so many people, young people going through terrible illnesses and I am tempted to delete this post now, but I won’t, because I want to be able to look back on this post and say Elaine, you were so silly not to live in that moment, instead you were worrying about what was to come.
Love so special and unique for me
A love I’ve waited so long to see
My love, my heart, I give to you
Never doubting our love is true.
To have you hold me in your arms
Experiencing your loving charms
You have my love for ever more
The special man who I adore
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Five little angels came to me
Trying to save my soul you see
Four little angels said “Oh No”
What can we do to make her glow
Three little angels shook their wings
Lets see what tomorrow brings
Two little angels would not give in
So they decided they must sing
One little angel said, “We must believe in God forever”
“Its Simple really we must all stick TOGETHER”
Copyright ©2016 Elaine’s Blogger Paradise.. all rights reserved.
I love that twinkle that sits in your eye
The smile on your face as you pass me by
The kindness that’s in your soul
The discussions we have that make me whole
Always prepared to talk deeply to me
Making me realise what I need to see
I could not imagine life without you here
With you beside me I’ve lost my fear
When we married we made our vow
To always live in the here and now.
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When the realization hits you when you have nothing left
It’s a horrible feeling which leaves you bereft
A fear of the future, a desire to hang on to the past
A panic in your heart, you hope wont last
Who knows what the future for me will hold
I have to be strong, I have to be bold
All I can say, without any doubt
I’m going to start living and see what life’s all about.
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Seth is 6 years old and a whizz on the wii
His goal in life is to always beat me!
We sit and play together and the time flies by
He’s really very good and has a good eye
Mario is his favourite game to play
I spend most of my time in a bubble floating by
He laughs at my attempts to work my way through the maze
Usually it’s because I’m in a bit of a daze
Oh what it is to be young and quick to react
But computer games are not for me and that’s a fact.
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When I read the daily word, I tend not to look at any of the other entries for fear of it influencing my post, I also try my hardest to think outside the box. I love to write a poem and try to save the key word until the very end and today I almost wrote a poem but then a memory came back to me from almost 30 years ago.
When my two daughters were approx 5 and 7 years old they used to climb into bed with me and we used to play a game, that game was called the sandwich game. Obviously the two on the outside were the bread….. but what sort of bread…. brown, white, crusty, garlic, fruit … etc
Then the special one in the middle had to say what filling they were, we had so much fun and although my daughters are now 35 and 37 they both remember the fun we had playing that game. It made them use their imagination and it made us all laugh.
So many years have now passed and they both have children of their own. Yesterday John and I picked up two of our four grandchildren from school and took them back to their house where my granddaughter Ruby who will be 9 on the 12th of this month was very proud of the fact that she was going to make John a cup of tea and Seth who is 6 was keen for him to try a scone that he had baked all on his own.
I may not have got everything right in my life, but I can say that by allowing my children freedom of speech all the way through their lives and encouraging them to use their imagination has paid off.
My ex-husband and I tried our best to guide them to be loving, good human beings and I believe we achieved our goal.
The perfect sandwich really 🙂
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