I rang my mother this morning to check that she was still alive, she was and our conversation went like this.

 

Me:   Hello Mum are you ok today?

Mum:   I was just about to have a nap

Me:   Why, are you tired?

Mum:   Yes, I’m 86 on Friday

Me:    Oh, are you playing that card now, you’re 86 next

Mum:   laughing, yes, I am

Me:  You should be sitting in the garden in the sunshine getting a dose of vitamin D

Mum: I need a nap, not vitamin D

Me: okay

Mum:   Hmm, I rang your uncle last night he was 89 the other day

Me:   Now that is old

Mum:   Yes and the poor beggar is still waiting on his wife hand and foot, she had a word with me too

Me:   What did she have to say

Mum:   She told me she can’t stop weeing

Me:   What!

Mum:   I told her she was lucky I have to take water pills to make me wee,

Me:   Too much information mother

Mum:   She said she has a hospital appointment this week

Me:   Oh dear

Mum:   She says she is going to have bottocks

Me:   What’s bottocks?

Mum:  I don’t really know, but its supposed to stop her weeing all the time

Me: (the penny dropping) Do you mean Botox?

Mum: Yes, that’s what I said, they are going to inject it into her bladder

Me: I’m needing to go to the loo myself because I was laughing that much.

Mum: What are you laughing at?

Me: You don’t know how funny you are, I feel this could be a post for the website.

Mum:  NO, don’t put this on your site she may read it

Me: What!

Mum: No, it should be alright, they won’t even pay for Sky TV so I doubt they have the internet. You can put it on, now I’m going for my afternoon nap.  Bye.

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